Sep 28, 2012

so long, farewell.

i've chronicled my love of travel. food. my sister's kids.
my disdain for landlords. smoking. and full-priced clothing.
i've typed about triumphs and shared the real nitty-gritty crazy i try to keep locked away.   

and now, when i'm not spending my time at the best job on earth [yes, i've got it!], i'm spending it with that handsome husband of mine. or my sister's kids. or the cat that captured my heart. in new york city. or new england. it seems like i've been everywhere but here.

and in the wisdom of my late 20s, i've realized that my capacities ARE limited. i have a finite number of things i can do well simultaneously. currently i'm trying for wife. worker. sister. friend. and when that's not filling my time there's vacation planning. institute teaching. gym classes. diy projects. and sunday school lessons.

sleeping always makes the list. ALWAYS. but blogging hasn't.
if you're out there - come find me on instagram @noellenicolai

dear life,
you're wonderful. and i love you. 

Jul 30, 2012

on my mind

things on my mind lately:

1. sometimes even when you love what you do, it's hard to do it EVERY SINGLE DAY.
2. colorado is a great state.
3. i absolutely HATE that life decisions are driven by financial realities.
4. it's stupid how much i love these kids.

5. i've always felt like i was going to win the lottery. and then i read a study on extroverts and how they always think they'll win and i was devastated.
6. the olympics make me cry EVERY SINGLE DAY.
7. i would like a gymnast's tush.
8. i'm still having a hard time with wants and needs.
9. i'm mourning the loss of cherry season.
10. where did summer go?
11.  i opened the New York post to a random page and found out a high school friend had died while hiking in denver. it's been weighing on me.
12. matt's sweet little cousin is just stella's age and fighting for her sweet little life. and it breaks my heart.
13. god is good. even when bad things happen. 

Jul 19, 2012

happy happy birthday

i love this girl.
like really really love.

10 years ago, i made a friend who's honest, thoughtful, amazing, faithful and kind. and aside from being all of those things, she encouraged me to try to be some of those things too.

she's picked out outfits for me.
given me bathing suit pep talks. (heaven knows i need 'em)
thrown amazing birthday parties.
listened to me cry.
prayed i wouldn't get kicked out of school.
talked me out of crazy crafts. 
and been there when i needed her.

we can go to park city and have fun. or all the way to london.
we can sing along to dixie chicks in the car. or to kenny chesney in concert.
we can sob together at the notebook. or cuddle up on the couch to watch the o.c. all night long.
we can talk every day. or not see each other for months and be JUST THE SAME.
it doesn't matter what we do, if we're doing it together.

this july 20th, i'm especially thankful for 28 years of kimbers.
and all the exciting things that will come to her in the next 28 years.

Jun 24, 2012

the truth is...

we had an incredible connecticut day yesterday.
made breakfast together.
laid out in the park.
threw a frisbee.
rode our bikes to the beach.
had a delicious lunch at beach cafe in old greenwich.
walked to an adorable ice cream shop.
and rode our bikes some more amongst 10-million dollar homes. 

but when we came home.
and wanted to go see brave with friends.
and realized there wasn't really anyone to call...
(not anyone that lives within a 20 mile radius at least)
it was a sad ending to our really great day.

the truth is, we've had a lot of great adventures.
driving x country (MULTIPLE times).
traveling europe.
landing our dream jobs. 
but relocating every 12 months makes it difficult to put roots down.
and now we're ready.
but not so sure stamford is the place we want to be rooted...

but if you know any young couples who live in the area and might like to see brave, let me know.

Jun 18, 2012


lately i've been loving, in no particular order:

1. matt
2. spending time with the nicolai fam
3. stella & anton
4. the beach that is 20 minutes from my house. (come visit in stamford and i'll take you_ 
5. penny (my new bike)

Jun 1, 2012

2 minutes

lately, stella has taken to the phrase "two minutes."
as in "i'll be ready in two minutes." "i'll do that in two minutes." "i'll be finished here in two minutes." to let all of us know she's not quite done.

nap time? two minutes.
leaving the park? two minutes.
say goodbye? two minutes. 

she's not saying NO to what happens next, just that she's not quite done with what's happening now. she wants a little more time.

today was a hard day.
(a cry on the phone with your best friend for 40 minutes kind of day.)

i wish i could say that the problems were mine.
i can fix my problems.
or control them.
or try to.
but they aren't. and they can't be.
and all i really can do is cry with (and for) the people i love who really had a hard day.

and when these hard days happen i want to press pause.
slow down.

i want to determine what happens. and when. and at what speed. because it seems to me that things are happening too fast. and everyone just needs a little more time. even if it's just two minutes.

so for stella's sake, and really all of ours, i'm praying for two minutes tonight. 

May 31, 2012

dear friends,
i don't want to be separated anymore.


May 21, 2012

one day

some small goals in life.

one day... 

- i might own a DVF dress
- i want to have a signature recipe that everyone enjoys
- there will be a car full of 4 babies, and maybe one of them could be dark and swarthy? (and still matt's...) 
- i'll host a book club with all my best friends and read only non-fiction NYT best sellers.
- i will grow a garden with tomatoes and basil.
- we'll travel to hawaii (2013 might bring that day!)
- write letters regularly, real letters not emails
- i'll be able to play my french horn again
- i won't worry about ruptured discs and back problems
- master homemade meatballs (erica still has a head start on this one)
- i'll say i love my arms

today, i just want to walk again. 

May 12, 2012

the italian itch

it's hitting me pretty hard right now.
that annual itch to return to italy.

meet me in amalfi?

Apr 26, 2012

awesome but lame

[sydney, shanghai & san fran] 

angelique once had a boyfriend who openly disagreed with my father at the dinner table (no really, it was shocking...) he had some other deplorable habits we didn't quite fancy, and a website - despite its overall mediocrity, its name aptly describes how i'm feeling about life tonight:
generally awesome, occasionally lame.

awesome: traveling first class around the world to places i've never been, experiencing cultures, people and experiences i never would have. and getting paid to do it. 

lame: traveling first class around the world WITHOUT MY HUSBAND. frequently. i'm boarding a flight to south america on sunday and i'm absolutely dreading it. i'd rather have my blood taken. i'd rather walk through a haunted house alone. i'm not sure you're grasping the gravity of what i'm saying - THE LAST THING ON EARTH I WANT TO DO is board another plane for another week away from home. i've spent more time in sheraton hotel rooms since moving into our new apartment than i have my own bed.  

awesome: a brand spanking new apartment with a wolf range (culinary dream come true), lots of natural sunlight, and a 5 minute commute to work.

lame: the apartment is in stamford, connecticut. it's not in manhattan. or london. it's not even in a state where we have any friends.

awesome: your sister coming over for dinner. let's be honest, since leaving hotel nicolai, matt and i have had a hard time readjusting to a life with JUST TWO people. we were really looking forward to seeing erica & jason tonight ... but ...

lame: a crazy long work day that left you drained. which lead you to close your eyes for 20 minutes. which turned into 90 minutes. in which time your sister arrived at the apartment, tried to call you to get in to enjoy said dinner, waited, called some more and then went back to their house because YOU WERE IN A COMA.

awesome: taking 90 minute naps.

lame: not sleeping at night because you took a 90-minute nap then stressing about how tired you'll be at work the next day when you have 2 uber-pressing presentations to complete before EOD.

awesome: best friend from college is just a train ride away.

lame: best friend from college is a 60-minute train ride away, which feels like a lifetime when you're used to having them in the room across the hall.

i don't need sympathy. these are first world problems. but if you could give me: sleep, quality time with hubs, a live-in niece & nephew, unpack our boxes, or complete those pressing presentations i'd love you forever.
and ever.
and give you all my skymiles.