Jan 30, 2008

Dear Theories on Life,

Dear Diminishing Returns,
So much for economic theory. My tax return is diminishing neither in amount or in the joy it brings to my life.

Dear Karma,
I'm still waiting for you to come around and bite some pretty nasty people in the ass. Did you miss a connecting flight or something?

Dear Reincarnation,
I'd like to come back as my kitten Luci, so that my mother will shower me with endless love and attention, ham and cheese, and "smooshes" to my hearts content. I'd also like to come and go whenever I chose, sleep wherever and whenever I damn well please, and act like I don't hear people calling my name or telling me what to do. Think about it and get back to me.

Dear Murphy's Law,
I'm exposing you. You're not a law at all, you're a theory, without proven experiment or documentation. I'd like to change that - I have proof. Remember that time there was a rush assignment at work and 2.3 million postcards were sent out with the wrong phone number, then after reviewing a data list we found that some individuals were receiving up to 2000 postcards at their residence ... all occurring when the client was under fire and scrutiny for other mishaps. Worst outcomes, worst timing - documented and proven.


Leesee said...

Yeah Karma... I have some people for you bite in the ass too!

E.F.G. said...

fashion karma has proved true and in turn for your years of dedication with few mistakes, has delivered you *perfect* wedding dress. ta da!

valerie said...

you forgot the one:
dear benefit of the doubt,
you don't work because when it comes down to it people are lazy, stupid and incompetent...and fools and morons...and you benefit nobody...except for the morons...so what's the use?