Dec 12, 2007

Dear Inventor of Christmas Lights,

Dear Inventor of Christmas Lights,
Brilliant Idea. I hope that you collect royalties for every bulb displayed this holiday season.

Dear JCREW,
Thank you for knowing that
1) I wanted the lawn-colored Bella velvet jacket in a size 4 ALL SEASON and
2) Was desperately looking for something to wear to the Nicolai family Christmas party this weekend and
3) Am on a budget.
Due to your keen sensitivity to my fiscal restrictions I paid approx. $60 for this beautiful $170 jacket.




Dear Rachelle Morris,
Thank you for the entertaining emails.

Dear Facebook,
Thank you for nothing. I fixed it on my own.


(Please see below text to understand the situation...
Dear Facebook…

My name is Noelle Nicolai- clearly stated in the email address- and I’m in a terrible predicament. Tired of my facebook addiction I decided to deactivate my account temporarily on Sunday December 9 around 9:00 pm. I shortly thereafter realized it was a terrible decision and tried to reactivate. HOWEVER, I’ve since graduated from BYU, the network to which I belong, and they’ve removed my email account access. I signed up under Noelle31@email.byu.edu. To prove I am who I say I am:

- I’m in a relationship with Matt Lybbert, however my status does not indicate that- and if you can somehow check your files I tried to link my profile to his about a month ago- he declined, and in real life outside of the virtual realm, it caused a jocular argument.

- My most recent album is called where everybody knows your name displaying pictures of my coworkers Valerie Leach and Laura Rees (you can call Thomas Arts to confirm my identity through them as well)

- Yesterday, 12/9 I posted on Shannon Cornelius’ wall, Kelsey Nixon’s Wall, and Kent Breard III.

- I started a group called Elect Judge Francis Nicolai New York State Supreme Court Justice (which he won by the way- that’s my dad)

- But here’s something the avid facebooker wouldn’t know about me. I’m a member of a private group called the Fab Five. Kevin Smith, Jacqueline Kenndedy (most recently married to our friend Patrick Nord and changed her facebook name to denote that) Scotty Hutchison and Sklyer Stevenson are the other members. The majority of the photos are of us sledding and eating cheeseburgers at Red Robin.

I have another email account, Noelle.Nicolai@gmail.com that works quite well. I also have this one, and please feel free to call our receptionist at Thomas Arts to verify that I do indeed work here. I miss my wall and scanning pictures, and promise never to deactivate again if you’ll help me out of this predicament.

Thanks for your help and cooperation. If I can provide with you any other information, let me know.
I’ll tell you my old password if that’d help… p******e. (the name of my first car in college)


Looking forward to getting my mini-feed up and running.
Yours sincerely,
Noelle Nicolai )



Dear Alarm Clock,
I'm not mad at you for not making gentle wave sounds to wake me this morning, I secretly loved sleeping til 8:00 and wasn't sad I was 10 minutes late for work.

Dear February 15 Road Trip,
Can't wait to see you. Let's hope gas prices drop, it'd make for a sufficiently more lovely trip. I'm already brainstorming playlists to burn.

Dear Drew Peterson,
Still guilty.

2 comments:

Shannon C. said...

This is too hilarious! What is going on with facebook, honestly?

Meredith said...

blogger is the new facebook